Authentic Empowering Collaborative

I am not the type to cannonball into the pool…

… without testing the water.

So, I won’t expect you to either.

Life can be so overwhelming.

The more things seem out of your control, the more it feels like you are carrying the weight of the world on your shoulders and you become stuck.

“Nothing is more desirable than to be released from an affliction, but nothing is more frightening than to be divested of a crutch.” – James Baldwin

The desire for a better life, a better self, is something we all think about… but the fear of change, the fear of the unknown, the risk of opening up old wounds… that’s scary.

You have been surviving, just getting by…

…but believing that life could really be different, be better, hey!

Maybe you could even feel some joy, laugh a little, take a deep breath and feel peace.

It is possible…I would know, I’ve been through the journey myself.

I won’t tell you it is easy.

I won’t tell you there aren’t tears.

I won’t tell you I felt better in a month.

BUT, I will tell you, IT IS WORTH IT!

Investing this time in yourself is the greatest gift you will ever receive.

Put yourself first; live that life you have dreamed of!

What therapy looks like…

I am going to give you a preview through the testimony of one of my clients. She wrote this letter to share her experience and support others who were considering therapy as a path for healing.

To those thinking about therapy

I know you don’t know me, and I don’t know you; but please read this with an open mind. I don’t know your story or what you are going through, but Nicole asked that I write a letter to someone who could possibly benefit from hearing mine.

If there is one thing I’ve learned in therapy it has been to take care of myself first. I didn’t for so long. In one year, I gained 50 pounds. I had to borrow my sister’s maternity pants, because I couldn’t fit into anything. I had become so depressed. I couldn’t sleep. I isolated myself from my family and friends.

I’ve cried more times this year than I probably did my whole life. But I let myself FEEL my feelings. I taught myself to be comfortable in the uncomfortable. I learned to love myself.

I found strength inside myself that I didn’t know I had. Therapy held me accountable. There were days I didn’t want to go… so many times I would have rather closed myself off from the rest of the world, but I didn’t because I knew the only way out of this darkness was through it.

I read somewhere once that “we don’t heal in isolation; we heal in community.” I’ve meditated on this saying for hours on end. It was only when I learned to not be ashamed of my situation that I was able to reconnect with my family. They welcomed me with open arms, and I felt a sense of peace I was missing for so long.

I began to laugh again. I had good days! I smiled more. I cried less. I learned to be proud of myself.

So here’s to you… for the strong person you are and the one you will become. Don’t forget that you are worthy of all the happiness and love the world has to offer.

Keep going to therapy. Be vulnerable with others. Share your story. Be kind to yourself.

Take care of yourself,

Julia

You can’t control everything…

Even though we dream about being the best versions of ourselves, there are so many obstacles that stand in the way.

That’s where connecting with a good therapist comes in!

I am here to help you make that dream of your best, most confident, successful, loving self become a reality.

Yes, depression, anxiety, stress, relationships, parenting and work may impact us daily, but these things do not have to control our ability to find joy and live life intentionally.

In this process, I will be here to support you and provide the tools to help you move through life with more confidence!

Recipe for Mental Health

Cooking is a passion of mine.

People are always asking me for recipes, and I love the compliment. But I get confused looks when I tell them that my recipes change every time I cook.

When it comes to recipes for mental health, my approach is similar to cooking. I begin with core ingredients, and then I adjust the recipe based on the individual, specific needs, personal history, and unique goals.

Much like any bread recipe needs water, flour, yeast (unless you are using a keto recipe) so, too, all therapy begins with authenticity, empowerment, and collaboration.

Authenticity – Bridge the gap between the person you project onto the world and your true self. By focusing your energy and determination on finding your core values and beliefs, we will create a life where you are able to let go of who you think you are supposed to be and embrace who you are!

Empowerment – By bringing awareness to and changing your pattern of maladaptive thoughts, you will find power and confidence in waking up each day and pursuing a life that is reflective of the best you! I will be your cheerleader during the tough times. I will support you, laugh with you, cry with you, and be there for the ups and downs. I will remind you that even though you don’t feel okay right now, it’s possible to feel okay in the future.

“You can’t win in life if you’re losing in your mind. Change your thoughts, and it’ll change your life.”- Tony Gaskins

Collaboration – Asking for help is not weakness. To reach out for support, to know that you cannot do it alone, that is strength, that is courage. It can be hard to ask for help when you feel like you have nothing to offer in return; it can be tough to be vulnerable. According to Brenѐ Brown,

“Vulnerability is the core of shame and fear, and our struggle for worthiness; but it appears that it’s also the birthplace of joy, of creativity, of belonging, of love.”

The more you invest in therapy, the more I can help you. Together, we will create a life worth living for.

About Nicole

“Everything can be taken from a man but one thing: the last of the human freedoms – to choose one’s attitude in any given set of circumstances, to choose one’s own way.” – Viktor E. Frankl

My grandmother was my inspiration.

My grandmother was a Holocaust survivor. She hid in a 2-foot underground basement for two years, and her brother was murdered in a concentration camp. She had trauma to last a lifetime.

For some Holocaust survivors, that is exactly what happened: Their trauma controlled their life. They lived to survive, and every day was a struggle.

But for others, like my grandmother, she decided that she would survive to LIVE her life with purpose.

Choosing a life of purpose…

She CHOSE to fight the fight, prioritize her mental health, surround herself with a support system, help others, and live with intention and truth every day.

It is my goal as a therapist, wife, mother, daughter, and friend to continue her mission.

I started Choosing Tomorrow Counseling to support others in living their truth… and living life with purpose as the best version of themselves.

Education and professional training…

I earned my bachelor’s degree from the University of California San Diego and went on to get my master’s degree in Marriage and Family Therapy from Touro University.

I am licensed as a Marriage and Family Therapist in the state of California (#111777), AASECT Certified Sex Therapist, Certified “Bringing Baby Home Educator,” Certified Mental Health Integrative Medicine Provider, and I completed Level 1 Training for couple’s therapy from the Gottman Institute.

When I’m not chatting with clients, you can catch me…

… hanging out with my husband and two kiddos, … using my culinary school skills to challenge friends and family to a home version of “Chopped” or “Cutthroat Kitchen,” … drinking endless amounts of coffee, … or finding that steady balance of reality TV shows and inspirational reading.

Let’s get started!

I have a quote in my office: “This is not your practice life.” I don’t display it to be harsh; I have it to support clients in the realization that… … NOW is the time to live authentically, intentionally, and passionately! It all starts with a phone call: (805) 410-3193